Tips for Picky Eaters
(Guest post by Vanessa Mercer, School Counseling Intern)
Just in time for the holidays!
Food anxiety, food phobia, and picky eating are all very different. Is the child irrationally scared or fearful of food? Do they refuse or react negatively to eating certain foods? Do they refuse to eat all foods? Any other mix of event and reaction? How a child reaches food acceptance may differ according to the unique situation and the unique child. Alisha Grogan MOT, OTR/L breaks this down a bit in her article What if Your Child Wasn’t Anxious About Food Anymore?
Various studies show that between ⅓ and ⅔ of parents will describe their young child as “picky” at some point. While most grow out of this, 10-15% of children will become “persistent” picky eaters, and many in that group may have “extreme” picky eating. Language and definitions are not consistent, and you may stumble upon labels and diagnoses like ARFID (avoidant restrictive food intake disorder), feeding aversion, selective eating, and so on. Regardless of labels and diagnoses, a child’s picky eating is described as extreme if their eating is affecting their social, emotional, or physical development and causing family conflict or worry”. https://www.extremepickyeating.com/define-extreme-pickyeating/
https://www.extremepickyeating.com
Alisha Grogan poses 5 reasons children may refuse to eat in her article 5 Surprising Reasons Kids Refuse to Eat:
Medical
Sensory
Some approaches to texture preferences: https://www.momables.com/picky-eaters-a-texture-problem/
Mechanics/oral-motor skills
Routine
Behavior
Research on phobias show that exposure can be a two-pronged tool when approaching food: as familiarity with a food increases, fear decreases, therefore resulting in eventual acceptance and liking. Child Feeding Guide offers 4 suggestions:
Take your time: it can take between 15-20 exposures (or offerings) before a child is willing to put a new food in their mouth
Offer foods in different forms: i.e., carrots can be offered cooked with a meal, raw as a snack, or grated
Relax the pressure: pressure is the number one researched pitfall when it comes to encouraging eating. Refer to https://www.childfeedingguide.co.uk/tips/common-feeding-pitfalls/pressure-eat/ and Alisha Grogan’s tips below
Think outside the plate
Tips/steps from Alisha Grogan:
https://yourkidstable.com/anxiety-with-food/
https://yourkidstable.com/best-strategy-picky-eating/
Stop the pressure! This is Alisha’s #1 and most important step. A child that’s anxious about food will likely find most success when they feel some level of control over their eating, and feel comfortable and safe to do so. Pressure looks like bribing, rewarding, distracting, begging, shaming, or coaxing. Alisha’s research says this should be eliminated first and foremost.
Talk to your child about their anxiety around food. Choose a time unrelated to food, when you’re one on one and they’re receptive to talking. Alisha suggests saying something like, “I noticed that you get upset when there’s vegetables on the table. I want to understand better. Can you tell me why you think you feel that way?” This question may not get much of an answer, and you may need to rephrase or try again in a few days. But, this conversation when approached from a supportive (not pressuring) standpoint, helps your child feel like you’re on the same team as them.
Make a plan for a small step with your child. Highlight that this can be REALLY small. Alisha gives some great suggestions for your child to try, including: putting the feared food in the grocery cart, cleaning the food (if a fresh fruit or veggie, etc), allowing a small amount of the food in a section of their plate (or on a small plate or bowl nearby), tolerate the food on the same table, pick a recipe that includes the food, help cook or prepare the food, serve others the food.
Also check out her article Picky Eater Tips for Older Kids
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